What are the pros and cons of choosing surrogacy

1. 🩺 Pros and cons of choosing surrogacy for intended parents
2. 🤰 Pros and cons of choosing surrogacy for a potential surrogate mother

Each way of creating a family has its own strengths and weaknesses. If fertility treatment is medically futile, but the desire to have a genetically related child is strong, surrogacy can make you parents.

Surrogacy opens up the possibility of parenthood to anyone who wants a baby: married couples, LGBT families, couples in partnerships, single men and women. For example, if you are a single man who wants to become a father, there is a program for surrogacy in the Netherlands. This way of creating a family is perceived as an easy solution. In fact, in addition to the pros, there are also cons that are important to consider before using services of a surrogate mother. 

Pros and cons of choosing surrogacy for intended parents

In order for intended parents to weigh the pros and cons of this way of having a baby, let us look at the pros and cons of surrogacy. 

Advantages of surrogacy:

• The opportunity to become parents of a genetically related child (both intended parents or one of them) even if there are medical contraindications or objective inability to conceive and bear.

Medical contraindications to pregnancy, unsuccessful infertility treatment are no longer obstacles. For LGBT couples it is the only way to become parents of a child genetically related to one of the partners.

• Clear legal regulation: In countries where there is a strong legal framework for reproductive technologies and surrogacy, intended parents will not face a surrogate mother's claim to their child. 

The commitment of the parents and the gestational carrier will be reflected in the contract, and all parties will know the outcome of the programs.

• A sense of belonging: the parents-to-be, thanks to the established contact with the surrogate mother, will be able to experience the joy of pregnancy, and will be able to observe the bearing and birth of their baby.

• High probability of success of the procedure. The surrogate mother has experience of at least one healthy pregnancy and birth. She has a much higher probability of achieving pregnancy and successfully bearing a child than the intended mother after fertility treatment.

Disadvantages of surrogacy:

• Surrogacy is a complicated process. Many medical procedures, nuances of legislation in the field of reproductive law, registration of parental rights in respect of the newborn. To successfully complete the program, you need to choose a reliable clinic with a team of experts to guide you through the process. 
• High cost of gestational carrier services. You will have to pay for previous IVF procedures, IVF protocol (often more than one), reimburse the expenses of the surrogate mother during pregnancy and pay her fees after the birth of the baby. Legal services, accommodation and food in the country where the program is carried out and other aspects will also be required.
• Psychological burden. Often intended parents exhibit increased anxiety and desire for control in relation to the gestational carrier. This can have a negative impact on the relationship between the surrogate mother and the intended parents. To avoid conflicts and frustrations, they are strongly recommended to visit a psychologist.

As you can see, surrogacy is a responsible and complex process that is not suitable for everyone. In some aspects, adoption seems to be a simpler path to long-awaited parenthood. However, families who have successfully experienced the birth of a child from a surrogate mother, unanimously say that the result is worth all the effort and money spent.

Pros and cons of choosing surrogacy for a potential surrogate mother

Women who have decided to consider a surrogate mother should also take into account the possible advantages and disadvantages of this role. The merits of surrogacy for a potential surrogate mother are:

• Satisfying the altruistic need to give the joy of parenthood to those who have been denied it by nature;
• The opportunity to experience the joys of pregnancy: many women enjoy going through the exhilarating experience of pregnancy;
• High fees for bearing a child: the money received can be used for the benefit of her own family (quality education for her children, starting her own business, solving the housing issue, etc.);
• Legal security: mutual expectations and commitment of the parties are reflected in the contract, which guarantees financial compensation to the surrogate mother and no responsibility for the baby after its birth.

But before choosing the role of gestational carrier for yourself, you should consider its disadvantages:

• Surrogacy is a physically and emotionally demanding process. From the need to take hormonal medications, to the emotional distress of bearing someone else's child;
• Large time costs: the need to visit doctors much more often than in your own pregnancy, to meet the intended parents and maintain contact with them, to participate in legal procedures for the legalization of the newborn.

Both the intended parents and the potential surrogate mother need a preliminary consultation with the specialists of the chosen reproductive clinic before entering the reproductive program. A detailed consideration and understanding of their expectations and obligations increases the likelihood of a successful completion of the reproductive journey for both parties.

Authors, contributors:

Vladyslav Feskov
Chief of the Surrogate motherhood Center of professor Feskov

published: 17 February 2024
updated   : 20 February 2024

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